So far...

So far...I miss my regular food. I tend to eat when I am stressed. I don't know why. It is a very bad choice. I just enjoyed and I felt like it was something for me, especially my treats after the kids went to bed. Therefore, this has been extremely difficult to stick to. I am doing fairly well. I have been getting up earlier and working out the past 3 days and I can already tell what a major difference that has made! I am more energized later in the day and I sleep better at night. I still don't want to get up and do it, but I am making myself. I am finding new things to use as treats and I am counting days until my bonus points so I can even finally have my favorite treats. Tom is doing this with me which helps me so much! He is sticking to it really well and motivates me. It helps having the support at home. Whenever I am making something or eating something he asks how many points it is. Not to be controlling, just because he doesn't know. It helps me make better choices so I can tell him how little it is and how good it still tastes! I know I can at least move toward my goal. I feel better about life even just the few steps I have taken. We will see come weigh in day how much I have lost!

I can do it!

So, my 30th birthday falls in 13 weeks. I knew long ago that I did not want to turn 30 weighing what I weigh. So, onto my favorite weight loss program Weight Watchers. I have joined a group with my sister and some friends. The best motivation if my husband has started counting points with me! It is much more challenging when he is watching points. It means I cannot cheat. So, the goal is to lose 30 pounds by my 30th. I started in at 170. I have worked out most days this week so far. The only hard part is I am so used to snacking and it is very difficult to give up chocolate and all the other bad stuff I love so very much. I am figuring out new ways to fight it though. My favorite ice cream is out in the garage freezer now so I can't get to it as easy. My favorite cones went into the trash and the other stuff I enjoy has been put up also. I want it, I need it and I know I can do this.

The 2010 me

Isn't it amazing how 1 day makes it seem like everything can change and you can simply become a whole different person overnight? Then only 2 days later you realize you are still the same person and everything has remained the same. I vowed to myself that there will be some changes in my life. I have not however really begun those changes. There are many things I would love to be better at. My spiritual life, my financial life, my organized life and my home life. I am however really looking at myself in these areas. I can say I want to be just like whomever (my mom, a good friend, a tv personality) but I know I need to just be myself. There are many areas that need to begin being changed. How do I make all these changes. I am tired of the excuses...If the kids would just sleep through the night then I could get up early...if I just had some time alone then the house could get cleaned right....If I just had more money I could buy the things I needed that would change our lives drastically!...And the wonderful, Oh Lord help me today to be a better person (while never actually making any attempt to do it even if He does give me the ability). Once again, all excuses. So, 2010 is here, almost 2 weeks in, I am the same 2009 version and yet longing so badly to be the 2010 person I had dreamed I could become. You see, this year brings about a few things. 10 years ago my husband and I met, my oldest child turns 5 and will be in school 5 days a week! My second will be in preschool and the baby will be turning 2. And of course the scariest is I will be 30 this year. You know how you have this picture of yourself and it never really feels like you are getting older, and then it is beginning to hit me. 30 isn't old at all, however it is not the young carefree 20's person. I have goals before I got there and now I need to reach them. I promised myself when I was 30 I would not weigh what I do now, or have my house or checkbook look like what it does right now. So, cheers to 2010. May it finally be the year that the changes really happen!! Wish me luck.

Merry go round

There are these moments throughout the day of being a mom that you feel like you are "outside yourself". I recently had this type of day. I was constantly on the move, between one kid wetting their pants, another with a diaper explosion and then, oh there goes the other missing altogether. And when not dealing with the "output" we are dealing with someone crying or fighting or being whiny until mom separates, cuddles, or picks them up. Why can't they just learn to play on their own. Do I not allow them to learn this? Tom has to sleep so the kids can't be loud. I can't afford to move us to a bigger house to keep them away from him. I can't leave everyday or the chores never get finished. If it doesn't stop raining they can't go outside without dragging in more mud than I thought existed. And then of course after all this chasing, fixing, cleaning up, changing, more changing, fighting them to eat healthy and then realizing it is time to eat dinner and I did not even realize until this second! So, now we are having a quick microwave type meal, then onto a horrible bath time, kids stalling and "oh my goodness please just go to bed" moment!!! And after they are all in bed I sit down and cry, wondering why doesn't my dream of being the "perfect mom" happen. I have so much to do, and as much as I want to believe all the people who say cleaning can wait, I just can't. I want to at least have some clean dishes, laundry folded, something. I feel like I am stuck on this merry go round that just won't stop for me to be able to make any progress! I know it is just a stage, and I know having 3 babies is crazy to even be able to function, but I just can't help that very strong piece of me that just needs to live in an organized hosue. Not perfect, but more functional than this. Maybe tomorrow it will be different. Maybe tomorrow "tinkerbell" will spray her fairy dust and the kids will play happily on their own! If not tomorrow, someday....

Penis envy

It had been a very long day and Chloe had skipped her nap so she was extremely emotional anyways. Well, Connor has always been the type of kid to not question things. If you say it is so, then that is what it is. That evening he was telling Chloe how he has a "pee pee". She of course says I want one! Connor tells her that no, she has a bum #1, (Not sure where he got that from but OK) and that everyone has a bum for going poop with. So of course this makes her cry super hard sobbing about how much she wants a pee pee like Connor. Connor is so proud that he has something she wants and being the typical older brother says, "no Chloe, you cannot have a pee pee, but maybe next time". I am trying so hard not to laugh while just trying to listen to the things they come up with. I eventually explain the parts to the two of them (of course they really could have cared less at that point) and I get Chloe to stop crying. I think that is the end of it for the moment, but who knows when the penis envy will start again! Someday she will be glad she does not have one!

Yay memories!!

So it was one of those mornings. Since Tom works nights he was off in bed and I decided to try to take a shower. With 3 young kids this is usually a very non-private moment that is as quick as it can be! Connor and Chloe were watching Playhouse disney and Kylie was in her bouncer chewing on a teething toy laughing as I played peek-a-boo in between shampoo and conditioner. Well, Chloe has now began potty training and came in to try and go. She didn't but Connor did not want to be showed up so he decided he wanted to use her potty and proudly showed off how quickly he could poop! Chloe thought this was great but wanted to be a helper and dump this show into the big potty so she could flush it. So, while I am covered in shampoo and soap trying to say no, let mommy do it, she grabs it and dumps it ON the potty. This was because the lid was still closed. She says, oh sorry mommy and proceeds to wipe it up using her hand! I am now jumping out of the shower tripping over their bath toys and Kylie (who is just watching everyone run around crazy like) in her bouncer saying "stop!". I manage to grab the potty from her but she slips away and starts to run out. Of course, now I have to chase her to get her back and cleaned up. I am of course, in full view if someone had walked up to my door so thank goodness no visitors. Connor of course had to tell me that I dripped water all over him and that he needed a towel. I managed to dry him, wash Chloe and get back in the shower to finish washing my hair and then finish what should have been my 5 min shower. Once I am finally finished I can just think back and say "Yay memories!"

Thanksgiving and Uncle Daniel's birthday

We enjoyed a beautiful Thanksgiving. Tom had worked the night before so he had to sleep most of the day. The kids and I relaxed, watched the parade and talked about Thanksgiving. We played with the "Little people thanksgiving set" my parents gave the kids. It was lots of fun!

We then headed over to "Grandma and Grandpa's" for a big dinner.

Nanee got some cuddle time with Kylie..


We tried for a pic with all the kids but Chloe wasn't feeling it


Beautiful, stylish Auntie Mel


And of course Uncle was there


Kylie sat with Mom and Dad


Connor sat with his Uncles in the big boy chair (high chairs left for the girls)


Chloe was ready and waiting


Grandma always takes the picture so I took one of her taking ours!


There is her beautiful face...


Kylie wanting those delicious rolls


Here is the family


And this year Uncle Daniel's birthday shared Thanksgiving day


So instead of pie, we had birthday cake! (works for me!!!)


Chloe loves cake but still tries to keep clean!


It was a wonderful day filled with great food and lots of fun family time. We stopped by Tom's family after dinner and hung out the there for some day after Thanksgiving shopping plans. I can't wait for this time next year!

Fall pics!

I absolutely love fall time. The colors, the harvest and most of all the leaves! The school near us had a large amount this year and we managed to sneak over to play in them and take some pictures before they were all cleaned up.

Running through the leaves..

Playing peek-a-boo


Posed pics



Holding Hands


Chloe's collection continues to grow...


Connor walking


Chloe's beautiful blue eyes


Auntie Mel came to visit on lunch break and help run after kids!


Big dreams of climbing the trees


Even Kylie posed (on the wet ground but so cute it was worth it)


Beautiful Chloe's winning pose...


It was such a blast and the fall time was gone all to soon. I can't wait until next year to do it again!

Christmas Spirit?

I have been so bad about blogging lately. I have my pics downloaded and ready to go but I just have not found the time to get them up. I am in the "Christmas Spirit" of sorts. I wanted this one to be so different. I am at home, I can shop whenever, I can play with the kids more and yet I am still stressed. Hours spent shopping for that perfect gift, time stressed about driving in this horrible snow and ice to finish my never ending list. Is this really all there is to the holidays? Why when our intentions are so good, does it end up being frustrating. I love to give gifts to my friends, family and spouse and kids. I don't even care if I get one gift this Christmas. But I guess wanting to make it special is almost making it more stressful. I hope above all my family knows how much I love them and I have the best intentions.

Happy Halloween!

Halloween for me was very different this year. First off I am actually home and not working which meant we had lots of time to hang out and show off our costumes to all the family! My kids dressed up as a Beaver football player, a doctor and a bunny!

It all began very early in the day with a trip to my old work.

Then it was off to see Uncle Daniel.

Next stop was Grandma Liz...She helped us make rounds all over the bank for candy!

Next stop was Auntie Mel's work (and of course more candy!)




Then we made our stop at Nanee's (Chloe was tired and didn't feel like being in the picture)

After some naps it was off to see Grandma and Grandpa...
A healthy snack for the doctor

And a smile from Kylie after she is finally free from her costume...

Then we get to visit with the Green clan and compare all the cute costumes!


After lots of trick or treating it was time to meet up with Grandma Liz, Uncle Robbie, Aunt Jessica and cousin Taylor...






And at the end of the night the kids finally settled down around 10:30 still asking for more candy!

It was a lot of fun and I can't wait until next year!